slova ira

based on real and imagined life

ouch June 30, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — slova @ 12:38 pm

so my sister is in bermuda and my brother is going to peru tomorrow…
my fabulous vacations will have to wait…
in the meantime, i can be happy that i don’t have to worry about this:

“While it is been written that this fish enters the urethra of human bathers (one article – Lins, Journal of Urology, 1945) claims a U.S. navy surgeon named Charles Ammerman operated on three candirú victims, in one case slicing into the bladder to extract the fish. Now, it is certain it does based on a recent report of a human having urinated while in the water and the Candirú entered through his penis opening. The catfish had to be surgically removed at a hospital in Manaus. The disbelieving urologist (Dr.Anoar Samad) who performed the operation was not certain at first the fish was in the urethral tract but x-rays proved it was in there stuck. (Information verified by Dr. Paulo Petry, Bio-Amazonia Conservation). The Candirú is considered by some to be the only known vertebrate to parasitism human beings, however that is an erroneous postulation. Truth is the fish enters humans more by accident than design, fortunately it is rare occurrence they enter human bodies! Schultz (Piranhas – Fact and Fiction, 1964 and Myers, 1977 Piranha Book) related some interesting stories of this fish. One in particular having to do with Candirú being found in drowned bodies of mammals. Schultz states Candirú “can hollow out the entire body and when these mammals are pulled to shore, the Candirú fall out!” He also related a local belief that “Candirú would follow the stream of urine of a person standing on the banks of a stream, to get into the urinary tract!” Of course that is not true.

This little catfish has been known to enter the gills of fishes where its parasitic nature takes over by feeding on blood and bits of flesh. Such is the nature of this miniature beast—a vampire-like to say the least! A smaller Amazonian fish, dubbed the vampire catfish, was recently discovered in the Araguaia River of the Amazon Basin. These transparent little fish are shown in deeper detail (see Fink image above) entering the gills of a fish.”

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i haven’t taken a shower in 3 days June 29, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — slova @ 7:22 am

because my sunburn hurts and i now have open wounds. shutup.
however, i have been to a BABY shower and just received an invitation to my second bridal shower this month.
it’s running me into the ground, financially, all these presents you have to buy for these things. this must end! all you kids need to calm down…NO MORE WEDDINGS OR BABIES for about another year so i can save for all your goddamned presents!

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burning and peeling June 27, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — slova @ 5:59 pm

q: what do you get when you have 125 beers, 8 packs of smokes, 5 hours, 13 beautiful people and 2 joints on the guadalupe river?

a: boozing, vices, drama, laughter, craziness, dorsett’s greasy dinery food, dizziness, exhaustion, the worst sunburn in my entire life.

 

Checklist June 22, 2005

Filed under: Uncategorized — slova @ 1:12 am

It’s delightful, it’s delicious, it’s delectable, it’s delirious, it’s dilemma, it’s de limit, it’s deluxe, it’s de-lovely.

I have the day off from work today. I just took it, like “YOINK – I’m taking a day off.”

In order to feel like I’ve sucked every ounce of enjoyment out of my day off, I must do at least the following:

* Take a 30 minute nap
* Clean my room so maintenance does not find the skulls, dildos and WMAs when checking the air-filters today “sometime between 1pm-3pm.”
* Be gone between 1pm-3pm to avoid awkward apartment complex interaction complex
* Drink coffee outside and smoke cigarettes with people who do not have to work during the day
* Lay out in the sunshine at Barton Springs next door
* Get wet and/or dirty
* See a friend in the daylight – I wonder if they look the same
* ANYTHING I WANT!

 

Google-icious

Filed under: Uncategorized — slova @ 12:52 am

This is for Emily. Only for Emily would I spend my precious, precious time wasting away in front of the computer merely to post images from Google that answer the following questions…

1. Where were you born? (Haha, this is a picture of the STATE hospital…)
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2. Where were you raised?
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3. Where do you live now?
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4. What is your name?
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5. What is your favorite food?
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6. What is your favorite drink?
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7. What is your favorite odor?
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8. What is your favorite band?
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9. What are your favorite shoes?
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10. Where do you go to school?
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